A house in Seattle where charming serial killer and ladies man Ted Bundy sexually assaulted and attempted to murder teenager Joni Lenz has been demolished and turned into a parking lot.

“This is a tragedy, a national scandal” said Bob Cocknobski, spokesman for state tourism, “that house was a part of American history, it should have been preserved for all time as a monument to Bundy’s free-enterprising homicidal genius”.

“Michael Jackson may have been the king of pop, but Bundy truly was the king of sadistic sexual murder. He makes Jackson’s suspected kiddie-fiddling antics look like total shit”, he added.

The parking lot developers shockingly revealed that they currently have no plans to mark the spot of the historically significant site. 

Despite the tragic loss of the historic building, plans are now underway to open Bundyworld, a Ted Bundy themed amusement park situated across the road from the newly built parking lot. The park will feature a 100ft tall Bundy statue in the entrance, welcoming visitors with a disarming smile and blood spattered blunt implement.

A spokesman for the new development said: “utilising the latest interactive possibilities of modern technology we’ve designed the ultimate multiple sexually-motivated homicide family fun day experience. There’s a pair of authentic replica female student asscheeks to bite into – that one’s going to be a big favourite with the dads! We’ve also built a replica house filled with Mexican illegal immigrants that we’ve made up to look like human beings; you can beat them to a pulp with whatever household implement takes your fancy. There’s even a “try-out” area with various phallic objects on display so there’s something for the moms to do while daddy and the kids are off having fun. Not to mention a driving simulator where you can cruise around at night in a Volkswagen Beetle with the lights off and a rape kit in the trunk.”

 But rival theme park, Richard Ramirez’s Realm of Rape, is already planning on stealing Bundyworld’s thunder by organising a concert with Ramirez’s favourite band AC/DC, whom he listened to whilst driving to brutally murder and rape his victims.

AC/DC’s schoolboy guitarist Angus Young, having kicked his football over our website’s fence, told us yesterday, “Can you give me my ball back mister?” However, the band’s singer Brian Johnson said, “we’d be honoured to pay tribute to our most infamous fan. Ramirez is the metalhead’s killer of choice, Bundy is more for Roxy Music fans or some soft and sensitive pommy bastards like that mate. C’mon Angus, put those drugs and whores down, it’s past your bedtime mate.”

On January 5th 1974, handsome nutjob Bundy crept through an unlocked window into Joni Lenz’s bedroom in the basement of a house she shared with friends. The charismatic killer then rammed a great big fuck-off medical vaginal probe into her cunt and beat her head about with a bloody great metal bar. The sexy psychopath then left through the same window that he’d entered through.

Lenz suffered brain damage, internal injuries and a sense of morbid starstruck wonderment, a sensation comparable to that of being fisted by Barack Obama in a gimp mask.