Morphine and Fentanyl given Services to Metal Award

This past Thursday, July 29th in a secret location in London (as if anyone in their right mind would want to attend anyway), the tiresome annual Kerrang! Awards ceremony took place.

The festivities, featuring a sodomy theme and attended by utter wankers from around the world, were hosted by vacuous idiots Slipknot / Stone Sour (huh?) frontman Corey Taylor and Anthrax guitar wimp Scott Ian (who had nothing better to do presumably).

At the ceremony, rock music’s version of Heat magazine paid tribute to the drugs Morphine and Fentanyl, a cocktail of which happily killed late Slipknot bassist Paul Gray in May, awarding the meds with the golden K! for Services To Metal. Taylor accepted the award on the pharmaceuticals’ behalf to a standing ovation.

After the awards, ITN (on what must have been the slowest news day ever) spoke to Corey about what the award symbolized to him and how it felt to accept the award for his beloved drug of choice. You can see the poignant interview somewhere else you fucking retards.

Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

16 Responses to “Morphine and Fentanyl given Services to Metal Award”

  1. blaaarghhh Says:

    does Kerrang even exist anymore?? (pardon me, I forgot the precious exclamation point at the end of Kerrang. On second thought, it never derserved on in the first place-so-omitted)
    it was always the WORST, trendfuck-iest rag on the market.
    Printed toilet paper. Not surpising that the jam wearing whore known as Scott Ian made an appearance. The only good thing I can say about Scott, was I do remeber back in 87, I did by a rag, cannot remember which one-was not Kerrang, I know that.
    But Scott was reviewing albums and he gave a rave review for “Into The Pandemonium”
    So for that brief, elusive, moment, way back yonder Scott had taste.
    Kudos Scott.

  2. Adrian McCoy Says:

    Fuck Korn!!! And fuck Slipknot!!

    Long live death metal!!!

  3. Adrian McCoy Says:

    And fuck Kerrang!!!

  4. Bicro Says:

    @ Adrian McCoy

    Right on bro!!

  5. Squidlord Says:

    On Veterans Day, we need to remember that there are Metal Veterans who have served and have given their lives for drugs, poverty, and various diseases. They are the true heroes, when you walk down the street and you see a vet, don’t forget!

  6. Jessica Says:

    Jam wearing whore? Whats that, like strawberry or summat?

  7. blaaarghhh Says:

    I’m thinking more like Boysenberry…
    is that “my” Jessica from across the pond?
    where have you been my dear..?
    the place has simply turned all boring and quiet..ala Western Roman Empire…
    now you..are all byzantine baby,,,lol

  8. istaros Says:

    I NEED MY FIX OF ANTIHUMANISM

  9. Bicro Says:

    Still here grinding my teeth.

  10. anus Says:

    you are all retarded pussies with 2cm brown dicks.

  11. Bel Says:

    I NEED MY FIX OF ANTIHUMANISM

    LOL

  12. Bicro Says:

    Grinding…when will we see the return…

  13. Sarah Says:

    The day Paul Gray died was a truly great day for music, although it did subject the world to the wailing shrieking grief of Slipknot’s odious fanbase.

  14. Bicro Says:

    OF DARKNESS AND EVIL!!!

  15. poopjokes Says:

    I KEEP POOPING MY PANTS. WITH EVERY FART I MAKE A CHILD DIES IN MOZAMBIQUE. YOU MAY LAUGH BUT IT’S NOT FUNNY WHEN IT HAPPENS TO YOU.

  16. Wehericmacht Says:

    Thank god the DJ, the rapper guy and the twinkish drummer are OK, though! \m/

Leave a Reply